Okay – so today was a bit rough. Watched a very motivational Joel about not letting anything take your joy away. I know that I allow outside sources to take my joy away. I know that being a martyr about doing household chores never makes the day go well – I also come off as a nag with the kids. I have high expectations of what their rooms should look like. If I help them – doing most of the nit picky stuff their rooms look wonderful. So as I kept saying to myself not to let anyone take my joy away – I allowed a disagreement with Melinda to set my mood for the morning. I got the “all you ever want to do is clean”. Yea – right – that is my joy in life to run around picking crap off the floor, sweeping, laundry, wiping down counters, etc. Sure – I could not think of anything more joyful than that. I took my shower with Melinda – not really a torture but yet not relaxing then I get that comment from her. I was pissed. I wanted to feel joyful and feel that we accomplished something for the day.
Randy had a talk with me. Really he had to drag out what was upsetting me. I wanted and therefore did tell Melinda that I would not be assisting with her cleaning anymore and that her room could turn into a huge mess. She actually couldn’t stand my dirty looks and silence as the morning wore on – she apologized. I accepted. Still pissed that I have not instilled cleanliness in my children. Randy talked to me and told me that I need to decide how to deal with their lack of cleanliness and stick to my decision – “children respond best to consistency”. Cause being consistent is easy – right?
Okay – to the point of the story – To paint or not to paint. We got back from Grandma Phyllis and Grandpa Dan’s without the kids. I looked at our walls and decided time to paint. No – not a real color – just plain old white. I needed to get rid of a line that came from a couch being pushed up against it. So out came the semi-gloss white paint. I got the wall done and then moved to the eating area where all of us scuff up the wall with our feet. The kids came home from Grandma’s. They wanted to HELP paint. Okay. They helped paint and are actually quite neat. They spill a little paint but overall did a great job. Gotta let them help or they will never learn how to do things. So – actually they did help today. I am grateful for their help. I will just make certain that the rules are simple and that I am consistent. The painting around the house is not finished – so they will get more practice. I keep telling myself – “it did not get this way in a day and it will not get fixed in a day”. (a flylady quote sort of)
Tomorrow – Melinda will want her friends to come over to play and being consistent the answer is “No, not until your room is clean.” Therefore, she can leave it a mess and not have friends play at our house. Her choice. Yes – I’m sure it will be a fight again – but what is parenting all about? I am not her friend – just her parent:)
Panayota the evil parent to my children and the “cool” parent to the neighbor kids.
Melinda plays while cleaning up.
Alex helps paint.
our extra child goofing around with Melinda
Tags: Neighbor's, Uncategorized, chores, parenting by Panayota
No Comments »
